


Hollow Shards

by Kircheis



Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Amaurotine Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), Angst, Enemies to Lovers, M/M, Miqo'te Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), Named Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), No BETA we die like dragoons in locked animations, Slowburn. Slow as I'm willing to take it, Spoilers if you didn't finish Shb Yet, Tags May Change, Warnings May Change, Wild lorebending at its finest
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-17
Updated: 2020-04-19
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:35:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23703991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kircheis/pseuds/Kircheis
Summary: Sometimes fate play cruel games with you.---Most of the times things don't go the way one wishes.They leave you broken, scattered across universes, just small hollow shards, echoes of who you have been before.With no choice to go back.---Emet-Selch and Warrior of Light (& Darkness) could write a book or two about it, really. If they  remembered, by the end of it all.
Relationships: Solus zos Galvus | Emet-Selch/Warrior of Light
Comments: 4
Kudos: 9





	1. Prologue

_Sometimes fate plays cruel game with you._

It would be one big fat lie if Warrior of Light (or Darkness, pick your poison) said that the tought of death never crossed his mind. Of course it did, numerous times! He was just a simple adventurer and danger was lurking behind every corner after all – especially after he became part of Scions.

_Fighting against Primals, Imperials, now Sin Eaters in the First and, in general, crazy assholes leaves a toll on one, right?_

But never ever in his wildest dreams did he imagine that light would be the death of him. Literally speaking. Back in Source everyone was hailing him as Warrior of Light, there were stories about how he defeated darkness with mentioned light, how he brought it back to Eorzea in the hardest times...

_How the light of Her blessing shined way through, yadda yadda et cetera._

Truly ironic that it was now tearing him apart in not-so-blessed way. Searing pain in one eye, blinded vision, heart throbbing in his chest, feeling of something slowly ripping through lungs. Miqo’te could really imagine a better way to go than this.

_But what could he do, really? Nothing. Just hang in there – as he always did. For greater good? For others? For better world?  
Nah. Not really. _

There was one more very important aspect that kept Kirch’eis Theba on his feet.

_He was not leaving this goddamned world before he settled things with those two fucking melodramatic idiots._

* * *

Emet-Selch was tired of this Warrior of Darkness. Tired and angry at him, to be precise. Not only this man was wearing _his_ face, completely under different name, he had audacity to sound and act so much like him.

_Why couldn’t he just be like any other normal shard?  
Why wouldn’t he just give in finally?  
Why to make it harder for **both** of them? _

Why would he stand in front of him with that annoying resolve on his face - as if he had every right to stick his freckled nose into things he didn’t understand? Dragging his lovely friends with him, of course. This wasn’t their battlefield to take victory on, this wasn’t just about one more Lightwarden or destroying of worlds – Ascians wanted it **_whole_** after all, couldn’t they see? Were they so blinded by their righteous purpose from Hydaelyn that even after he told them the real events, they just brushed it all off the table?!

_This was for their best, this was for **HIS** best._

How he wished he could hate him for all of the mentioned and more. And yet. Sometimes he caught himself watching him with soft smile, with fondness almost. He felt like back then in Amaurot, pride washing over him, when the other accomplished something-

_No._

It was wrong to even think about it. He looked at Warrior of Light. It was time to show him the final days of the Star, pass the judgement on that shade of stubborn fool he once truly cared for, one he _could never be **again.**_

_There was no need to prolong this tiring game._

* * *

They couldn’t say it didn’t come to them as surprise, when they were both standing, with every limb intact (more or less) in the end.

"What's...going on-"

Kirch’eis’ head was throbbing, it was hard to catch breath and it felt as if his heart got separated into tiny pieces and then got roughly stitched together in spawn of few minutes. But, he guessed, adrenaline got better of him as he was still standing, still determined to try to take step forward.

_At least the bloated light was gone. Hopefully._

Hades was clutching his chest in the place the should-be-fatal blow landed, obviously distressed. The hum of ascian magic was gone. He was meant to be dead _, for Zodiark’s sake_ -

But apparently, someone _up there_ , had better idea.

_Idea, he completely **loathed**. _

“Forsooth, after thee struck Hades with the Blade of Light, his very soul got separated.“

“You mean he is-“ Ryne looked at Uriager, surprised. Y’shtola nodded slightly.

_What he detested the most. Just…_

“A shard.” Crystal Exarch said calmly, looking at him.

_A piece of broken soul. Echo of the real person. His goals lost, as well as his people. All of that was just a memory that will soon fade in useless human brain-_

And he didn’t need anyone to stress it out for him, he understood that perfectly. And yet it felt like he was… lost. Defeated. Oh, mighty Emet-Selch **_defeated_** , ridiculous, wasn’t it? He raised his hand, (“No, you don’t!” Thancred hissed, drawing his gunblade again) snapped his fingers out of habit and… nothing happened. He sneered weakly, looking straight at Kirch’eis.

“Weren’t you always one of the lucky ones, _Hermes_?”

Warrior of Light & Darkness didn’t really have a chance to answer that as sudden pain broke out in his chest. Pain that didn’t stop – it almost felt like it was enveloping his whole body.  
The Adventurer’s vision darkened and he felt like two different voices were screaming at him in back of his head, tearing his mind apart. Whispers, words he couldn’t recognize and images – as if something was trying to come through, to the surface.

The last thing he heard before he passed out was worried voice of Ryne calling out to him and silent hum, distorted singing and rumble.

_Follow….Stumble… Listen… Answer…_

Hades’ question long forgotten as darkness enveloped him.

_Sometimes fate plays cruel game with you. And sometimes, even if you try and it seems like you changed rules of said game.... you find out you don’t really have a say in that._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes idea strikes you so hard that you really feel like you need to write it.  
> Especially after two years worth of juicy writing block.
> 
> Mentioned writing block almost came back as I had to write Urianger's sentence & come up with some Amaurotine-worthy-WoL-name but thankfully, shakespearean translator, @smilebettersuitsahero here at AO3 and one of my anonymous friends helped a lot and I'm really thankful about it. 
> 
> What else to say? It's not my brightest writing, I know. Especially ending of this chapter. It also isn't BETAed, unfotunately, but I had to get this out of my system before some void in my brain snacked on it. Is there going to be second chapter? Hopefully. Do I know where is this going? .... nah fam, we are making this up as we go, gonna be a wild ride.  
> Anyway. I really hope you like this little prologue and my wild lore bending in action. Also, yes, name of my WoL is in a way same as my handle (because I'm lazy to change it and have background for him already written, working with name) - but honestly I can't see him as my self-insert at all, heh.
> 
> Twitter: @kirchkirch


	2. Chapter 2

_The world behind closed eyes was shining with little bright lights, illuminating cold darkness. The silhouettes were raising high above the heads of creatures, the memory of something that seemed little too familiar. It felt as if person tried, they could touch them, feel them – and even be there, in that place as the little lights burnt brighter, became more powerful, destructive, eating away everything in their way._

_The Lights…_

_Crystal shining in white nothingness. As the hand touches the surface, echo of cracking fills the place, darkness pouring out of every one of them, flooding the space, suffocating._

_And the voice, above it all, still chants._

_Hear, feel, think…_

* * *

Kirch’eis opened his eyes. Maybe too quickly, as intense pain almost knocked him out again. He hissed silently, counting to twenty, trying to calm his breathing and focus on surroundings.

_He was… back in his bed. In Crystarium. Right._

Now that adrenaline from battle was long gone he could feel almost _everything_. Every muscle, every little nerve in his body. And not exactly in the way he wished for.

_Well… At least the pain served as evidence he was alive, if anything else.  
But still… it felt weird. Something was off, but he could not quite put his finger on it._

He lifted his hands carefully, observing them tiredly. Few scratches, but nothing that grave on the outside. His fingers were trembling slightly and he could feel the strange tingling sensation under his skin but that… that would pass eventually, Miqo’te was pretty sure of that. 

Kirch’eis touched his face slowly… and grimaced.

_Oh yeah. Found it.  
This one was possibly gone for good, huh? Not even Ardbert’s help could save it…_

Indeed, Lightwarden light left him with a little gift, to remember their merry times together _._ He traced the skin under his left eye, rough material of bandages brushing his against his fingertips. Miqo’te slowly tugged on it. It still stung, but… yeah. He’s been through worse.  
The worrying factor was still there though. Not only his perception earned quite a huge blow because of this (which wasn’t exactly the winning situation with his profession), but part of him was gone as well. Kirch’eis couldn’t lie it didn’t bothered him in slightest and that he would be okay just like that, with simple wave of his hand.

_Of course, it did. But… He could adapt. He could make it, somehow, he could learn how to live with it. He wasn’t any less of person without perfect vision._

Miqo’te hissed, digging his elbows to mattress, supporting himself, sitting up. His whole world spun, but he managed to keep balance and look around properly. His clothes were neatly folded and placed on top of armoire, as well as his grimoire. They even placed some flowers next to mirror. He smiled. It was nice of them, to care for him like this.

“You are finally awake and you don’t spare _me_ a little thought!”

_Well, whose this voice is, huh?_

“…Feo Ul.” Kirch’eis croaked, coughing. His throat felt as if he swallowed some of that magnificent food from Rhon Ron’s wares in Amh Araeng.

“I was worried for you, my dear beloved sappling! And what I get from you? Nothing at all, you little ungrateful mortal!”

“Sorry, sorry. Still bit sleepy and tired.” He chuckled silently. “I promise that I will mind my manners next time.”

“Well, in that case I might even excuse you, _snae yak_.” Pixie crossed their arms, smiling, gentle expression softening their face. “Your aether, your beautiful soul… the cracks are healed. You are whole again and your soul is stronger. Our _ker-m_ of Crystal returned with you and even the shadowless one! Lost creature found a way, didn’t it? In more ways than one.”

Summoner sighed, nodding. Sometimes it was quite difficult to comprehend the way fae folk spoke (maybe that’s why Urianger got along with most of them), but he had feeling, deep inside, he understood what King meant.

“It’s good to be back.”

“Indeed it is.”

This time, it wasn’t Feo Ul’s voice. Both, pixie and Kirch’eis glanced at person, who was currently standing in door of his room. Crystal Exarch – no, G’raha Tia - was smiling at man with warmth in his eyes, carrying little sandwich basket with him.

“I’m sorry for interrupting the conversation, Your Majesty, but I wanted to check on Warrior of Darkness, when I heard his condition improved in morning.” There was strange shyness about it all, as if he wasn’t sure he was allowed to step in, when he addressed other Miqo’te again. “I’m glad to see you awake. I know you need time for recovery, but may I have a moment?”

“I… of course. Come in.” Kirch’eis nodded, looking at pixie. “Feo Ul…”

They smiled.

“I’ll leave you to it, my dear sappling! But you must promise me you won’t forget your lovely branch, next time. Remember. When in need, just call my name.” With that, they spun above miqo’te’s head, disappearing into shiny little lights.

"They were checking on you as well as others. I can imagine the joy, when they found you awake."

G’raha placed the sandwiches on table meanwhile, sitting on one of free chairs.

“How do you feel?”

“As if Morbol chewed me up. But it’s getting better.”

“I’m glad to hear that. The second part of it, I mean.”

“Mmn. How do you feel?”

“All of the bruises are fading. The conjurers did great job, as always.” Man smiled. “The endless light is gone from the First again. It just serves as evidence that we… you won. Again. Some of old Sin Eaters are still lurking around, but they are taken care of. It seems like First is ready to start anew, finally, after all these years.”

“That’s.. good to hear." _It's good to know that the Light didn't prolong its unwelcomed stay._ "But I doubt you wanted to talk only about that.”

_And the fact he quickly looked away just confirmed it._

Awkward silence stretched between two men. It was in the end broken by Warrior’s deep sigh.

“Look. I’m not angry. Not anymore at least. Maybe a bit frustrated.” Kirch’eis said silently. “What happened, happened. We can’t really take it back, can we?”

“I apologize. I wanted to protect the world. Mine. Yours. This. It was my duty as I was the only one, who knew the future, the event that unfolded... But I knew you wouldn’t agree to it all, of course not, my death to save your lives was just a little sacri-“

“Listen, promise me just one thing, okay?” Summoner quickly interrupted him, looking at him with resolve. “First, no more lies; second, no more genius plans including sacrifices of self. I had enough of people in my life jumping into great dangers, deciding that I should be the one to survive - without asking me, without even telling me there is a possible threat. How about me, how about my choice? How am I better than them. Than you?”

“We do it so Hero can carry on and win-“

“No, G’raha, Crystal Exarch, or whatever you go by now. Please. I’m _tired_ of it, the whole heroism thing, the whole _‘we need to clear path for you’_. How about we just… talked. Maybe there could be completely different way to solve shit, but in some cases I won’t be even able to find out!” He snapped loudly, but immediately down. “Sorry. Look. I just… don’t want to lose another dear person to me. Easy as that.”

“Kirch’eis…”

“So, promise?”

Crystal Exarch looked at other Miqo’te curiously and his eyes softened. No matter the world, the time, his friend was still the same.

“Very well. I’ll try my best to keep it.”

Kirch’eis smiled slightly and nodded.

“Thank you. I’ll sleep more content now that I know you are not jumping into death’s arms so eagerly.” They both laughed, and summoner crossed his arms. “But still… There is one more thing.”

“What is it?”

“Emet-Selch.”

G’raha Tia’s eyes darkened even thought he was still smiling. It was evident he carried dislike for the mentioned man. “He is under constant surveillance, locked up in The Tower. Scions and Lyne are helping me with keeping guard on him and gathering information. Needless to say, he isn’t very cooperative. But it seems like what Urianger said was truth after all. Still, we are not completely sure yet.” Exarch crossed his arms. “At least there were no sightings of other Ascians for now. It’s hard to say if they know yet.”

“I… see.” Kirch’eis hummed. “I want to talk to him later.”

“I expected no less-”

Crystal Exarch continued talking but Summoner got lost in some of his thoughts. Small and big things were coming back, creeping in back of his mind.

_Ascian asked him something, just before he blacked out._   
_He… called him somehow, but he couldn’t remember what for Hydaelin’s sake._   
_And that weird dream he had just before he opened eyes, it was familiar-_

A sharp pain stabbed his head. He hissed.

_What the hell? Why was this happening again and again, every time he tried to remember?_

“-but before that, you are going to rest some more.” G’raha quickly stood up, looking at him with worried expression. “Are you okay?”

“Ugh. I’m alright. Yeah, just… Still not over that whole thing, I guess.” Kirch’eis shook his head, his ears flicking. “I’ll be fine, no need to worry, I just need few more days.”

Older Miqo’te didn’t seem to believe that _‘alright’_ part, but he left the subject alone, thankfully.

“I’ll tell others you are finally awake. I’m sure they will be delighted to hear the news. As well as I’ll try to stop them before they can kick your doors open and squeeze the living life out of you-”

“You mean Alisaie. Oh! Didn’t she yell at you after-”

“Now rest.” Crystal Exarch said firmly, blushing.

_Heh._

But he listened to him and laid back down, closing his eyes. The sound of steps, creaking of doors and he was alone again, only with his thoughts to keep him company. Those now slowly but surely kept returning to _that_ moment, to that sentence his mind decided to push out and the dream… only to be greeted with another painful headache.

Kirch’eis grunted silently.

_No, not good._

Seems like it had to wait a bit.

_But who was he to just give up so easily, huh?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fae folk language dictionary:  
> Snae yak - adorable sappling  
> ker-m = friend (used in singular and plural with suffixes my/our)
> 
> I got mad motivated because of your few comments and kudos, so here it is! Second chapter, slightly longer than my first one. That's kinda tradition for me, slowly building up that word count, lol.  
> If you wonder, how my catboi looks like, he has Instagram (kircheis_ffxiv)  
> I'm slowly learning of where I want this to go as well. We will meet Emet next time!  
> Once again, I'm sorry for all the mistakes in text, English is my second language and unfortunately, I have no BETA. 
> 
> Thank you for your understanding and reading! 
> 
> Twitter: @kirchkirch


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